I went back to work today, and I did much better than I thought I would. Adam stayed home with H, and I got lots of photos and updates about her during the day. But I also just felt surprisingly good to be working again. Using that entire catalog of brain functions and social skills again just made me feel like a better mom when I got home. Yes, it sucked not to be able to give her hugs at any moment. And yes, I may get hysterical tomorrow when I drop her off at the sitter’s and see how she reacts to being left with someone she doesn’t know very well yet. But today I was able to leave home at home to get stuff done for the kids’ arrival tomorrow, and then I was able to leave work at work, zero in on her when I got home, and then do whatever prep I had left for tomorrow after she went to bed. I was one of the first teachers to leave the building today, and I did not feel guilty about that.

I certainly don’t have this all figured out, and I know I’m going to have more bumps with this process before we all get used to it. But today, at least, was a pretty good day. Her bag is all packed for the sitter (thanks for the bag, Steph!).

This year’s lesson plan books are all made.

My first day outfit is ready, my lunch is packed. I’m going to go chill out for a little while and think positive thoughts.